Eddie McGuire is a Giraffe



Source: abc.net.au

 Well he has at least stuck his neck out. The headline was more like McGuire, Goodes Gaffe. I point this out as an example of an actual slip of the tongue, (ok in this example it is more of a slip of the eyes).


In reading the word “giraffe” I was concerned that all African wild life was now considered racist. If so, this would give a valid reason for finally ridding our televisions of the god awfiul “compare the meerkat” insurance add.

Eddie’s excuse for suggesting that Swan’s star Adam Goodes should be involved in promoting the new stage musical King Kong, was a slip of the tongue. And this only days after supporting Goodes through a racist slur when a Collingwood supporter called the Swan’s player an ape.

A slip of the tongue. This begs the question, what was he trying to say...

• Goodes should help promote Chinese Hong Kong.
• Goodes should promote his king size schlong.
• Goodes is the king of conga-line.
• The promotion of King Kong is good. (If he likes the promotion wait until he sees the show!)

Eddie, out with it, what were you trying to say when you clearly likened one of the games superstars with a 6meter tall wild gorilla?

The AFL quite rightly have decided this is an act of racial vilification. Despite this Eddie still proclaims to not have a racist bone in his body. This may be the case, but his tongue clearly has some issues with Australia’s first people.

Eddie clearly plays by his own rules, and deduces his own logic if he can still declare himself a leader in racial tolerance less than 24 hours after being found guilty of racial vilification. The pressure is getting to him. It is clearly his time on the hot seat. His arguments are as logical as many of the Millionaire Hot Seat contestants as they sift through the multiple choice answers. Can we dip the lights and have a drone sound effect? If the fuse timeline reaches the end before he makes sense are we allowed to say goodbye to Eddie McGuire from football?

Please say yes. He could ride his giraffe off into the sunset. With his head the size of a hippopotamus’ arse it was be difficult for the giraffe, but a spectacle worthy of a David Attenborough commentary.